I’m continuing to enjoy (and be challenged by) Sarah Bessey’s Jesus Feminist. Yesterday, I came across the following description of male privilege, from Bessey’s journey with the evangelical church:

“A woman managed the children’s ministry. Her role was almost identical to my husband’s role as youth pastor: she preached, prepared sermons, organized programs, counseled, loved kids, trained leaders, attended strategy meetings, and managed a budget, among other staff duties such as prayer meetings and hospital visits. And yet the church called my husband Pastor Brian, and she was just Lisa. I couldn’t figure out why her official title was director instead of pastor. I was told the omission of ‘Pastor’ from her title was ‘for appearances’–to avoid a direct challenge to certain passages of Scripture about women being silent in the church, or ‘You know–how women can’t be pastors.’ One person told me that it was also because if she had the title of pastor, she would automatically be part of the executive team, and the team needed to be only composed of men because a woman would change its dynamic. It was believed that her presence in their meetings would mean that the guys couldn’t be as honest or open; she would upset the delicate accountability structure and honest dialogue of the inner sanctums of church leadership. Lisa did not let her lack of a title hold her back from building a complex and strong ministry centered on discipling kids in the ways of Jesus. Semantics and titles weren’t her worry; she pastored those kids and their parents, whether anyone wanted to call her pastor or not.

Upon my introduction to the larger Church culture, I discovered that the way I grew up, particularly in terms of ‘women in ministry,’ was not common. Everywhere I turned, evangelical sermons on marriage were filled with ‘Oh, you know women’ jokes. Generally speaking, women were perceived as soft, emotional, and naturally nurturing, while men were positioned as natural leaders, hating to talk about relationships, and requiring more sex. Male and female relationships were framed as fairy tales where women are encouraged to be passive receivers and men are the heroic rescuers or as a contest and exercise in combat and negotiation. There was a lot of talk in those days of the ‘feminization of the church’ and how guys needed to step up and be men, which apparently resembled the ideal of benevolent dictators, rather than the Son of Man.”

Sometimes, you write a post that riles people up.

Monday’s post on Carl’s Jr. and their sexist advertising was one of those posts. Many replied on Facebook affirming that they too are (or have been) avoiding Carl’s Jr. Others sent me similar advertising tales of woe. So as a follow-up, I want to share two reader-generated ad fiascos.

First, there’s this company, Bottom’s Up Espresso, your Starbucks alternative…with a side helping of hypersexualized flesh and a liberal sprinkling of in-your-face sexual innuendo. This one hits close to home, as there are stores just two hours away from me.

Next, I came across this set of vintage ads. In case you’re tempted to think that male privilege themed advertising is a recent phenomenon, check these out and let your stomach turn. Here are a couple of examples:

And, just for continuity’s sake, note the star on this one:

Friends, we have a problem, and we’ve had a problem for awhile. Lord have mercy.

Our son Josh and I have been watching a lot of sports lately, which of course means that we’re also watching a lot of commercials. The other day, we were watching yet another round of commercials during a Lakers game, and I had a moment of parental clarity:

This is my moment to pull back the curtain on American materialism.

Now I forget what the commercial was, but it doesn’t really matter, because they’re all the same. Simply put, the message is “buy this, and your life will be better in some way.” Buy this new Lexus and you’ll end up with a mansion, a fleet of new cars and, yes, a cute black puppy. Buy a Subway sandwich and become successful, since of course Subway “is where winners eat.” And–you guessed it–buy some little blue pills and your marriage will never be better.

The reality is that commercials preach the gospel of materialism and comfort. They make the promise that if you plunk down some cash, you’ll get what you want…and more.

And in the case of Carl’s Jrs., that evidently means sex. 

I mean, have you seen a Carl’s Jr. commercial lately?!? If I was to sum up their corporate advertising philosophy, I think it would be scantily clad women eating burgers with dripping sauce. Heck, on the Carls Jr. website right now, you can watch a video of a woman eating a burger, you can buy “Eat Like You Mean It” boxers (huh?), and on the main page, you are greeted with this visual:

Subtle, eh?

In our family, we don’t eat a lot of fast food, but in light of their evident determination to equate their product with sex and with the objectification of women, we’ve definitely crossed them off the list. Feel free to join us!

This week, I came across this video. Entitled “How the Media Failed Women in 2013,” it illustrates the persistently sexist advertising and media coverage from the past year. May we do better in 2014.

Sometimes it seems like things are never going to change.

What I mean is that when it comes to gender equality in the culture and the church, I’m tempted to feel like we’re either not moving at all, moving backward, or if we’re moving forward, it’s at a glacial pace.

As I’ve said before, when people ask me if I think this situation is getting any better, my answer is always a qualified yes. As in, “we’ve come a long way, and we have a long way to go.”

On the other hand, perhaps that’s just my cynicism talking.

This morning I started reading Jesus Feminist by blogger and writer Sarah Bessey. I’m only one chapter in, but so far, so fantastic. And to read Bessey and her forward writer Rachel Held Evans…

We’re in the middle of a nothing less than a movement toward gender equality.

Here’s Evans:

“These stories are followed by groans, by laughter, by tears, by commiseration, by celebration, and often by sacred silence. They are being told in living rooms, sanctuaries, Sunday school classrooms, coffee shops, campsites, rural villages, city streets, and chat rooms all around the world. In the company of one another, women are finding their voices, telling untold stories, and singing freedom songs. A movement is underfoot, a holy rumbling. And things will never be the same.”

Wow. Now here’s Bessey:

“The Table may be loud and dominant , but love and freedom and spreading like yeast. I see hope creeping in, destabilizing old power structures. I feel it in the ground under my feet. I hear it in the stories of the people of God living right now. We’re whispering to each other, eyes alight, ‘Aslan is on the move.’ Can’t you feel that? The kingdom is breathing among us already.”

All things considered, I like the thought of being part of a movement.

In fact, forget the glacier. Maybe we’re in an earthquake.

Just over a year ago, in this post, I reported that the church of England had tragically voted against ordaining women as bishops. Using that as an example of the gender bias entrenched in the church, I wrote, “In other words, we’re not just talking about a problem in the larger culture. It’s in our house as well. Indeed, in the clerical (church leadership) world in particular, male privilege continues to thrive.”

Now let me use the Anglicans for a different kind of example. As reported in Christianity Today several weeks back,

“The Church of England has voted to draft new legislation that would allow women to be ordained as bishops.

The church will draft its new measure to approve female bishops by November, but any language likely will not receive final approval until November 2015, Reuters reports. Still, Anglicans have been awaiting this vote to re-start the process since the Church narrowly rejected the appointment of women bishops by just six votes in the House of Laity, one of the Synod’s three chambers, last November.

Archbishop Justin Welby says the mood within the church has shifted since then, and the Belfast Telegraph reports that he is ‘extremely optimistic’ about the promise of moving forward.”

It’s important to note that this isn’t the end of the road for the Church of England. There is more process to come. But, one year removed from the no vote, it’s a significant step in the right direction.

Come to think of it, maybe it’s more than a step.

Maybe it’s a movement.

I’m not a church pastor by vocation. But Erik Parker is. And he’s written an insightful post entitled “12 Reasons Why Being a Male Pastor is Better.” I’m going to excerpt his whole list here:

Like all the advantages of being white and male in North America, there are advantages when it comes to being an ordained pastor. Here are some of the obvious ones:

1. No one ever defines my ministry by my gender. No one says, “wow a male pastor or a man in ministry, good for you.” I always get to be just a pastor. I don’t have to constantly live with a qualifier in front of “pastor”, and I am not forced to bear someone’s inappropriate shock that I am my gender and I am a pastor.
2. People expect me to be direct and tell them what I think. They want me to lead them somewhere. I am rarely challenged or expected to defend or make a case for my ideas. I don’t have to apologize for having strong opinions or constantly defend my ideas.
3. People think twice about fighting with me. I always have a leg up in conflict, bullies find it harder to push my buttons because I have fewer to push. I am never automatically second class because of my gender, so conflict is on equal terms or tipped in my favour. I don’t have to suffer being called “boy” or “son” as way of dismissing my point of view, and I am not accused of being divisive if I disagree with something or anything.
4. People are used to pastors of my gender. There are no congregations that are unsure of male candidates for ministry, no parishioners who think it is alright to say something like, “I will never be buried by a man.” I don’t have to endure questions about whether I will take paternity leave, or what will happen when I have kids.
5. People almost never assume that I have a particular gift for ministry before they know me. They don’t automatically think that my gender is suited to particular areas of ministry like preaching or administration. No one assumes that I am not good at pastoral care or being nurturing. People don’t say that I have the gift of speaking with a voice that men can relate to.
6. I don’t have to worry about my safety. I don’t think twice about being alone in the church or if I am safe on my own. If a man asks to meet with me one on one, I don’t have to question my physical safety or his motives. Men don’t try to share the peace with me by hugging me (or grabbing my ass).
7. No one assumes that I am the church secretary or the pastor’s spouse. I am never told, “You don’t look like a pastor or you are took young to be a pastor” even thought I am built like a football player and at times have had long hair and a beard like a hell’s angel. And I have a tattoo. And I am 30 (two decades younger than the average age of pastors in our denomination).
8. Churches are built for men. Pulpits, altars, pastor chairs, vestments are all designed my size and body type in mind. I don’t look ridiculous because the standard garb of my profession is made for my gender, and I don’t look like a cross dresser in a clergy shirt.
9. All the pronouns are for my gender. God is a he. Jesus is a he. Pastors are almost always referred to as he or him or his. I don’t have to correct people because they never use the wrong pronoun to refer to me.
10. Being male is the norm in the church. I didn’t have to take classes in seminary about men’s issues, there is no post-modern male theology, male pastors where never brought in to speak about being male pastors as if it was special or odd or a novelty.
11. I could join the Old Boys Club if I wanted to. Leadership in the church is still overwhelmingly male, and there are no glass ceilings for male pastors in the church. No one pretends it is, “all in good fun” to make sexist jokes about my gender, and none of my colleagues treats me like I am second class because of my gender.
12. I don’t have to walk on egg shells in ecumenical situations. I don’t have to justify my position and call to my conservative colleagues, because they all have male pastors in their denominations. I am not an oddity or the token male at ministerial events.

I’m not a church pastor by vocation. But if I was, I think I would write up a list a lot like this. Thanks Millenial Pastor.

What about you? What on this list resonates for you?